A year ago
I thought all love ever did
was fold us into smaller pieces
until we are not there anymore.
I am not the first person you loved.
You are not the first person I have held the hands of.
I have a body full of scars,
we both know loss
more than the sound of our own voices.
Our love came,
when we had both given up on love.
And all your love ever did to me,
was make me grow, and grow,
until I could reach the sky.
Until I was the sky.
I fell for you,
when I was shaking.
Anxiety was eating my insides.
Ten months later,
And I wake up, not scared anymore.
I wake up, ready to fight.
You are every color of God's painting,
the root of the root of the creation of this world,
the madness of science that I adore,
the metaphors of poetry,
the reason of all reasons of physics,
the music in my head,
the rhythm that I know by heart.
And I,
I know it's hard sometimes,
to show me the cracks
of your perfection.
I know it's hard
for you to give me your soul,
completely naked.
But please know that I,
am not afraid to love you.
I am not afraid to hold you and call you my own.
I am not afraid of your scars.
I am not afraid of your bad days.
I, my dear one, love you, as you are.
Whether it's the days you are a blazing mid-summer sun,
shining so brightly,
dancing with the breeze
and laughing like pain does not exist.
Whether it's the days you are a hurricane,
quietly aching, and then breaking
everything in your way.
Or even the days you are
breaking down
into my lap
not knowing the answer to any question.
You are still the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
Because nothing,
not even my anxiety
not even my bad days
not even your worst nights
will ever change my love for you.
And even this, is not half of what
my heart holds for you
because I love you
more than my heart can ever hold.
